My Two Cents

On Bad Habits, i.e. bad temper
Do not find excuses for our shortcomings. We change and improve ourselves not because our partner wants or expects us to do so but it is US, OURSELVES want to do it. And, when it is your WANT, you will be more determine and will not feel so dreadful or like being forced by others. If u are determined to drop bad temper u will find all ways to control yourself (and i definitely knows that say is easier than done as my temper is bad also). One way u can try is when u feel u want to explode already, 抬 头 望望天 ( 或天花板 ) ， 让 自己冷静一下，想想一念天堂，一念地 狱 。 (I am trying this way now also.)

Love is sharing be it good or bad, sweet or bitter.
Some questions to you: Why do you date her? What is your opinion on her? When you are together with her, did u have any plan? Did u have any vision on both of your future? Did u share with her?

She is an adult (believe it or not? She is 23 years old now) and need to be treated as an adult. As she always has been treated like a child by all of us (mum and all sisters), i think deep in her heart, she hopes her BF treats her as an adult and let her feel she is useful and important and can be a pillar for you to rely on when you need her.

It is a correct way for not to let the elderly, like parents, sisters and brothers to worry about us but this does not apply to our partner. For a healthy relationship, it needs to be “laugh and cry together, share the fruits and bear the risks together, enjoy the good times and suffer the bad times together” and most importantly “learn and grow together”.

To me, sharing a problem does not necessary mean will burden your partner if you can give them confidence and assurance that you can manage it. Sharing thoughts and idea is also a way to reflect our respect to our partner.

To love someone, you need to love yourself first.
This is cruel but true. I learnt this in hard way from san jie fu. Get yourself back in shape first, please. Live on, move on, with or without her. Don’t attempt to win back love by earning her sympathy. This will not last long and you may feel revengeful to her in future. Focus on your career for the moment and try to show your improvement to her over time – may be turn to her as a friend first if this is an easier way to approach her. Since both of you have given this relationship a chance before, if it does not work out now, you shall move on. This may not a tragedy but an opportunity for you.

Lastly, a question for you to really think on, are you certain that she is the ONE for you?

A relationship will not always be a smooth sailing trip, it needs to go through thunderstorm and rough waves to make it stronger and for you to really appreciate it.

Fortunate or Unfortunate?

Looking at all the cute babies photos that sent by friend, I can’t put a smile on my face as I am thinking about those babies with abnormalities that showed on the Octo (a Singapore TV Channel programme). I have only watched for 3 episodes but it give me a really big impact. I have think about the triplet in US who were borned in their 24 weeks. They are blind and deaf. I respect the mother and mother’s boyfriend, who have support the mother all these years. (The biological father has gone nowhere.) Then, the second family with a daughter who has never grown up, despite already 16 years old, the young lady is still like a baby, she need to rely on the walker to walk, she is only the size of a 4 months old baby. The parent and the sister (2 elder and 1 younger) have take care of her for the past 16 years. The recent week has showed a baby with 2 faces – Baby Laili, who was born in a lowest class in India. She has not survived. But it may be a good thing to her parent.

Watching all these unfortunate cases that happened on the parent, I feel sad for them and I thanks god for giving me a healthy baby. I remembered when I first watched the show on the Triplet, I can’t sleep and tears flowed down from my face when looked at my own child. On the other hand, I feel happy for these children for having parents and family members who love them and have not give up on them. They are fortunate in another way.

Fortunate or unfortunate, this is a choice of yours.

Good Friend’s Wedding...

Good friend - FM in University has informed us earlier that her wedding will be held on 23 January 2010. Though the venue is far at Beruas, have been thinking that to attend the wedding with two others good friend with one stays at Johor, Kek (same with me) and the other at Malacca (CG). I / We?! have been thinking that Big Bear (Kek’s hubby) will drive and we will pick CG up when on the way to Beruas...However, the beautiful plan always doesn’t work so perfectly...

Few weeks later have been informed by Kek that Big Bear’s very very good friend also held his wedding on the same day...and he is not able to fetch us up while Kek’s also needs to attend company’s dinner on a day before.

The plan was totally ruin and i was totally no idea what to do and how to go. At the same time, get to know that mum’s medical report will be release on 28 Jan of which i definitely need to go up to KL. In heart i have already prepared the trip will not be materialise.

When called FM, she told us that we are her only “jie mei” (sister who accompany the bride to the groom’s house), and this made me changed my mind again. I was figured out hardly what to do in order to attend FM’s wedding. Try to convince Kek that FM needs us more than Big Bear’s friend needs him (very selfish act) but failed, try to convince Kek to let go her annual dinner and she agrees but her boss doesn’t allow as she is the committee member cum MC of the day.

Kek asked me to go with CG a day before and she will try to come on Sat but i rejected the idea. If go, three must go together and we must attend two functions. My insist is mainly due to i want the trip be more valuable as to attend the wedding, there are quite a number of arrangements and consideration i have to make. If i am away, my hubby and baby need to move to PIL’s house which mean it will trouble two parties. And since the date of the planned trip to Beruas and to KL is too near, this made me adamant. Also, if need to take public transport, we need to stop by Malacca to join CG and take another bus to Ipoh, and from there to take taxi to Beruas. The long journey makes me worry. Both good friends can have a good night rest after the trip but i need to take care my baby and to do some cleaning after few days not at home and need to work on Monday. I am really afraid i am not able to cope it.

I hope all my Good Friends can understand my situations.

Later, my good friends told me that they may hire a taxi to Beruas (from Malacca) and this will cost about RM550 (one way) and we will need to take bus to go back home on second day. Though it is a bit pricey and hubby is quite concern of my safety (but let me decide my own want ), i decide to join the trip since we are able to attend FM’s day time event which she needs us most. Again, nothing is smooth, before i inform my good friends my decision, i have received a call from mum that she will officially move to new house on 24 Jan. And, under this circumstances, i think my mummy need me more by going back to KL i can celebrate my mum’s birthday as well which falls on 25 Jan.

And, i still feel i have miss the chance to have a trip with my good friends and afraid that my good friends will blame me for not able to join in the event. =(

My Cambodian Maid

My Cambodian maid – Phong Ley arrived Malaysia on 14 Dec 2009. I went down to KL to pick her up on 18 Dec. She is shivering when the agent left, so do i. She feels nervous to have faced some strangers and i feel nervous to have a stranger at home.

My Cambodian maid is not bad (first impression) despite not great. She doesn’t know much English but i m satisfy that she knows the simple instruction, i.e. sweep the floor, mop the floor, wipe the table, wash the cloth and etc. She knows the name of some things at home, i.e. television, cd player, vacuum cleaner, blender, grill, window, plate, chopsticks and etc. She also knows some basic conversation like i full, i no hungry, i bath, good morning, good night...

This Cambodian maid only problem is she will feel dizzy when travel in car...even for short distance like from Sentul to Jalan Ipoh...a mere 10 min drives...

I have left her with my my mum and sister’s family on 20 Dec and plan to bring her back to Johor on 1st Jan after my trip to north. Aih..who knows i don’t have “yuan fen” with her as the agent called and asked us to send her back as she has failed her Fomema checking.The scene when we sent the Cambodian Maid back is so touch as she cried when we told her that we needs to send her back to the agent. On the other hand, my niece and nephew also cried and not allowed her to leave despite only know her for 3 days.

Despite the Cambodian Maid is mainly to assist my mum in law to take care of my baby, still have some kind of relief when think that the Cambodian Maid can assist myself and hubby on household. Thought that with the Cambodian maid, i can start to plan and implement my various GREAT plans for the new year. And the dream is now broken and i need to wait for two more months for another “UNCERTAINTY” to arrive. Meantime, i need to fight with the evil maid agency.

耕字...Blogging

很佩服师姐(Julia)，从宝宝出世至今十九个月了，不停的写部落格，不停的参加杂志比赛，赢了不少奖品。她所做的一切全都是为了让她的宝宝往后有一段美好的回忆。厉害，厉害，佩服佩服。而我，口说说就可以，真的要身体力行真的有些困难。一直都在说时间不够用，那，就等下星期当女佣来临后，再看看自己有没有开始勤于耕字吧！

I need to put my hat off to my senior, Julia. She has continuously updating her blog, participating in various competitions in magazines since her baby born in 19 months ago. She does all this for her baby. She wants her baby to have a sweet good memory in future. To me, dream and say is an easy task than really put it into the action. Always complain that time is insufficient for me to update my blog, then, let’s see whether i will still use the same excuse when my maid arrive next week yah...=)

Roller Coaster Mood

The mood is like a roller coaster this few days. Rushing for deadline and has been working till mid night for two days. Lucky to have hubby to help up to attend to little VT when he woke up at night.

Finally, successfully completed the assignment and grateful that the ultimate boss appreciate and praise the job well done. Who knows the happiness and relief does not last long...after few hours, some not so related colleagues from other department (whom received the assignment of which suppose to be their reference only) sent back the assignment with huge non-value added amendment. Feeling frustrated and sickening...

Pending bosses instruction, went back home early to have a good rest...when reaching home, looking around, feel so save and grateful that i still have a nice house to recover from my frustration. When see my hubby and baby, feeling so bless to have them in my life, to share my up and down, feeling touch to see baby to progress and growing day by day...

This is life. Read from a book..Happiness is forever short term...which will follow by some things that cause u sad, frustrated or have some negative feeling. U need to learn how to cope and blend it well to your life. Remember words from friend - 一念天堂，一念地狱 (your thought may bring you to heaven or hell) 。

又来一次。。。Blogging Again...

这，不是我第一次写部落格。。。
我的第一次因半途而废，所以彻底失败了。。。
希望这一次可以成功。

一直以来，脑海里都有无数的想法，感受，只是没有一一的写下来。是懒吧，也许。
写写部落格，让我想起中学时的日子，我是一个爱写之人，从中学开始，就持续的将自己的感受写下直到大学。开始工作后因没天时，地利，人和，所以逐渐的将这habit遗弃了。去年嫁到柔佛，时间太多，太多感触，又开始执笔，只是没有与人分享。

最近，该忙的事情都忙完了，结婚，生孩子，搬屋子，买车子，人生一切的大事都在一年半里经历了。。。日子开始无聊起来，看看有一师姐很勤劳地维持她的部落格(官言轩语)，心里开始蠢蠢欲动。。。只是没有信心。。。后来有一友人(蛋言蛋语)又sms说可以通过部落格与她联系，好让彼此懂得彼此的消息，心里的热情更是洋溢。。。

昨晚无意发现到原来全世界有好多摩登妈妈都在部落格里认识彼此，有者更成为了深交，所以，趁今晚完成了该完成的家务事，我也来凑凑热闹咯！

This, is not the first time i created my own blog...
My inconsistencies has caused my first blog a total failure...
Hope that i can be successful to maintain a blog this time.

All this while, my mind is running wild with various thought, feeling, opinion..just that have not write it down. Maybe, i am too lazy to do so. I love to write. I started to write since secondary school until university days. I have drop this habit when started to work by giving all sort of excuses like no time, no suitable place and right mood. I married and moved down to Johor last year, too much time and become more sentimental, i started to write again but never share it with anybody.

Recently, have almost gone through all the "life's necessary experiences", married, pregnant, give birth, moved house, bought car and the life start to become blank blank again...Looking at a senior has been very hardworking to maintain and update her blog, the heart start to feel itchy...just don't have enough confidence. Later, another friend from university sms me and told me that can contact and keep in touch with her via her blog, the heart feel more and more itchy...hehe..

Yesterday night, again discovered that there are so many Modermum blogging..and they get to know each other via blog and some have became good friends. Since i have finished my household today, let me OFFICIALLY JOIN THE CROWD to start sharing my life and point of view with you all=)